~Thinking, as I sit outside on a park bench~ 

hummm….growing in life,  is like the growth of a tree…

A tree needs sunshine and water in order to survive (loosely put)

If a tree receives too much… It dies…

If a tree receives too little… It dies…

In order to survive, a tree must receive a balance of both… but sometimes the balance is broken, and it is force to weather whatever fate has planned for it…. but if that tree survives, it grows taller and stronger. The more mature that tree gets, the stronger it becomes and that once little sapling has the potential to become a mighty oak.

I feel, the more we overcome those obstacles we face in life, the taller and stronger we become. There is one advantage that we have over trees, its that trees do not have the free will to change and control the factors their lives, but we do.  The older we get, the more choices we have. Now im not blind mind you, I know there are some things that are beyond our control, and even though we cannot control our destinations, there is always some point in our live where we can control which road we choose in this life.

Just a thought… ~my words~

Welcome to another day in my life.  If most of you don’t know I have a younger brother. He is 25 years old and right now he is having problems adjusting to being a father and a responsible young man. Unfortunately, the mother is definitely not in the "Ideal" state of mind and was not ready to accept the responsibility of being a mother. So my brother has to step up quick, grow up quick and deal with the responsibility that has been placed before him. The good part that my brother not alone with this issue, even though he has some growing up to do, we are family and we do what we can, when we can, to take care of our own, without question…without compromise…  If we all share the suffering together, it is not as difficult as one suffering alone. ~My Life~

Today, Mothers day…..

12:14 A.M. and im sitting here listening to Life Jennings, My mind wandering in the darkness thinking about my life, what my mom has done for me. Seriously, people say that mothers shouldn’t be praised for doing something that they are required to do by parental right. Well, its easy to say that until you see bad mothers, and some out there can be a trip. So im blessed that mine was definitely better than most and the best to me.

I really don’t know how to say it, so im just gonna.  Mom, thank you….

I remember you working hard, young, doing anything you can to keep everything together. I remember you coming home with that burger king outfit, tired. I was only four then and it was just you and me. Then along came Breon, I remember the day you brought him home. I spilled Red Kool-aid on the floor and you whipped me for it. I swear I didn’t know that lid was turned the wrog way lol!

I also would like to thank you for not being one of those mothers that would be at war with their baby fathers, you did your best to keep me from being exposed to adult problems. You never said a crossed word about my father, even when I would hurt you saying that I like him better, you said I would learn, and I did learn that the better parent is not the one who comes around once a week and take their child out for pizza and ice cream. Its the parent who is there all the time, When you laugh, when you cry, the one who would clean your wounds, and sing you a song when your feeling down, the one who would whip you when your bad, the one who helps with those science projects, the one who looks after me all the time, not just when they feel like it.

Thank you for doing your best, even when there was no work you found work, hopping from town to town, nothing was beneath you. I remember us moving to the country, you got a job picking tobacco and cotton,  I would watch you from my uncles front porch, I could see you in the distance. The hot summer air made your body look like a wavy silhouette.  I would watch you work for hours; I would play a game in my mind guessing which one was my mom.  Even though I was a child, I could see that you sacrificed a lot for me and my brother. Doing what had to be done, what needed to be done, no matter the consequence.

I remember you taking me see my father, driving for hours in a car that would barely run with a rusted out bottom. We could see the road through the hole in the bottom of the car. Me and breon would ball up paper and push it through the hole..lol…we were so bad….*no comment* Oh and thanks for all the ass whippins

Thank you for loving me, like you said, it was just us three and we had to make it work. You taught me how to be a man, how to cook, clean, so I could take care of my brother. when he was sick no one there to watch us. I was prepared to feed my brother, bathe my brother and give him medicine and you taught me all that when I was in the third grade. I thank god that we are still a team to this day.

Last but not least, I would like to thank you for believing in me when no one else did. Those years were rough on you; I made your life very difficult. You saved me from the sins of my father and you told me I could do anything and nothing was beyond my reach if I would just try.  When I would sit frustrated about having it hard you would tell me “Baby, Who said life was fair?” You taught me that I will be fighting for the rest of my life so I can either cower down, or be and man and stand up! With a little hard work, a straight “F” delinquent became a Straight “A” Achiever. I wasn’t even mad the school told me they didn’t even care to order my diploma because they thought I wasn’t going to graduate. We showed them!…lol

Your are amazing! God bless you forever

Love your son.